October 26, 2016

I bet I know what Hillary Clinton wants for her 69th birthday today. As a Republican (really, a Libertarian), I voted against Donald Trump when I filled out my absentee ballot last week. I told Kim and Kate last May that I think Clinton will win in a landslide. The summer months eroded my confidence in that prediction – not so much because of the email leaks, rather a fear that people either will write in or leave blank the ballot for President. Now, I’m more concerned that people may not vote at all assuming it's a fait accomplis. Here's to a clear majority, so that Donald Trump will have to concede with rapidity. I concede that I will miss Alec Baldwin's parody of Trump, but not enough for the latter to be President.

​Kim and Kate left yesterday for nine days. I rode north with them to Dover so I could drive the "Flying Couch" back to the beach house from the repair shop. Doing so served both them and me: they wouldn't have all three of their vehicles in Philadelphia, and I would have a car at my disposal. The "Flying Couch" is a 2002 Buick LeSabre which Kim inherited when his uncle died. The seat doesn't slide forward so if you have less than a 31" inseam, you can’t drive it. And, either it has no lights, or they're always on: at the risk of the former, I won't drive it at night.

It is odd to have a car at my disposal. It is also odd not to have a schedule. This summer I had advance reservations at every campsite, so I knew where I was going to be when for a period of three months. Each move involved a trip to the grocery store and other retailers from which I needed to procure goods I couldn't get from Amazon – things like plutonium. Now I don't know what to do: I could go to the grocery store today, but I don't need to go until tomorrow or Friday. I could go every day! But, I hate running errands and the grocery is 25 minutes from here. I am unused to such a dilemma.

I am also finding it odd to live in a house again. It occurred to me that I could become like the guy whose intent is to live on his boat during his divorce, but he never leaves the boat once the divorce is final. The truth is that I am an OCD nester: I need a home where everything has a place and everything is in its place. BOB serves that function, but in Kim and Kate's house my things are scattered all over my room. If I had a sewer hook-up, I'd move back into BOB just to put my things away. That being said, it's fabulous to have a washer and dryer, dishwasher, and garbage disposal again.

I applied for Unemployment two weeks ago. In retrospect, I was eligible to file in late August. I think I put off filing because I hoped I would get a job lined up for November. The job search process has been dismal. I suspect some executive recruiters think I fucked my career my jumping off the corporate hamster wheel 11 years ago, but I have been happier (and poorer) than my colleagues who remained on it. I couldn’t stand working for mean, greedy, stupid people. I couldn't stand the shamelessness of people who would say or do anything to get ahead. I couldn’t stand the nepotism, the sacred cows, and the fiefdoms. A couple of weeks ago I heard an excerpt from Margaret Heffernan's "Forget the Pecking Order at Work" TED Talk on Guy Raz's "TED Radio Hour." Every CEO should listen to her talk and then fire their "Super Chicken" executives. It's extraordinary how dysfunctional companies become as they grow in size: the CEO has his/her clique of groupies whose voices are the only ones heard; executives work for themselves and against their colleagues and the shareholders because they value their own political capital over the social capital required to collaborate; and, valuable employees are pushed out because they either shouldn't or don't want to be promoted. In the end, the customers and shareholders suffer as the company collectively pursues its "Game of Thrones" culture.

Unemployment requires that I look for work "at least three times per week on three or more different days." It requires a log of these efforts which can be requested for review of continued benefits eligibility. I wish that I'd kept a log from the beginning. I've applied for a lot of positions online, for some of which I have no record. I signed up for several job boards then removed my resume from them because I was getting calls for telemarketing jobs. I've uploaded my resume to the top executive recruiting companies, but I'm a square peg and they typically recycle the round ones. I've written letters to three executives asking that they hire me to be the SVP of New Business Development, and I included a specific business proposal in each. I've written to the CFO of a parent company asking that she waive the requirement to be a CPA for the VP of Finance and Administration position at a subsidiary. I really want to be the COO of $100M+ apparel wholesaler which I can help take vertical, but I've yet to see that position emerge online. The irony of Unemployment's job search requirements is that I had to stop looking for work yesterday so that I'd have something else to do today – like looking for work in the jewelry industry.
So, I'm going grocery shopping.

I went grocery shopping. The Flying Couch seat moved this morning. Perhaps it's because I hit the exit button on the seat memory program when I parked last night. The side mirrors are fucked up, however. Grocery shopping around here proved that I'm living in a food desert. Words like "organic," care free," and "grass fed" do not seem to exist at the local market. And, it didn't have the flavors of La Croix seltzer water I prefer, so I'm going to have to go to Target in Rehoboth. On the upside, there is a little liquor store next to the grocer. The guy who owns/manages it is a doll. He remembered me from May. I asked, "Can you order a couple of cases of wine for me, please?" He replied, "Sure, the Malbec?" There are three Bota Boxes in a case, and last May I would buy whatever he had. He started ordering an extra case for me each week for his Thursday delivery (so his other clients would also have something to drink). When I left last May, I stopped in and told him so he didn't overbuy for the next week.

I'm getting sick. Rats!